Yesterday, I received a lot of love from
my mom and mother-in-law.
My mom called after dinner and we had a long, and familiar, conversation where she recounted the weeks and days leading up to my birth. We talked about how much mystery there was when I was born and how today, I know so much about the little guy in my belly, even though we have yet to "meet". She had heard my heartbeat and seen a fuzzy sonogram before I was born, while I've seen my child's hands, feet, a 3D image of his face, watched him practice breathing, and even seen his aorta (it looks like a candy cane). My mom also talked about what it was like to expect to have a baby in her arms by Thanksgiving, but not actually meet me until January 5th. Things have changed!
We've had this same conversation before, (including how she watched Magnum PI before waking my dad and dropping my sister at the neighbors when it was time to go to the hospital), but as I get closer and closer to my due date, it is comforting to talk about some of my fears and hear her story, knowing that everything turned out ok.
Earlier in the day, Tucker's mom Judy sent me the blessing below.
FOR A MOTHER-TO-BE
Nothing could have prepared
Your heart to open like this.
From beyond the skies and the stars
This echo arrived inside you
And started to pulse with life,
Each beat a tiny act of growth,
Traversing all our ancient shapes
On its way home to itself.
Once it began you were no longer your own.
A new, more courageous you, offering itself
In a new way to a presence you can sense
But you have not seen or known.
It has made you feel alone
In a way you never knew before;
Everyone else sees only from the outside
What you feel and feed
With every fiber of your being.
Never have you traveled farther inward
Where words and thoughts become half-light
Unable to reach the fund of brightness
Strengthening inside the night of your womb.
Like some primeval moon,
Your soul brightens
The tides of essence
That flow to your child.
You know your life has changed forever,
For in all the days and years to come,
Distance will never be able to cut you off
From the one you now carry
For nine months under your heart.
May you be blessed with quiet confidence
That destiny will guide you and mind you.
May the emerging spirit of your child
Imbibe encouragement and joy
From the continuous music of your heart,
So that it can grow with ease
Expectant of wonder and welcome
When its form is fully filled.
And it makes its journey out
To see you and settle at last
Relieved, and glad in your arms.
What is ahead of me, I've done before, my mom, mother-in-law, and women everywhere have done before...and yet, it's still such a sacred and beautiful thing. I feel fortunate to have such loving support as I walk the path of meeting my son!
